Thread: World's Worst
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Worlds Worst Poet
other than "Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings of Geenbridge, Essex, England", who of course, is the creator of the worlds worst poetry. I know this as truth, for I read about it in this book.
(man in black shirt and beret mounts stage in "cool" coffeehouse and begins to snap, then says in low, "cool" voice):
"John Jacob Jingleheimer-Schmidt,
his name is my name, too.-yeah!
Whenever I go out,
the people always shout-
There goes John Jacob Jingleheimer-Schmidt!"-Yeah!
World's Worst Pharmacist
Dr. Jeckle or was that Mr. Hyde
Worlds worst NASCAR driver
"Yahooo! Boy, ninety miles per hour sure is fast!...............But where is everybody? Am I at the wrong track?"
World's Worst sword swallower.
"Ah! I didn't know they were that sharp!"
World's Worst Inventor
"By George I've got it! A solar-powered flashlight!"
(they really do sell these)
The World's Worst Make-up Artist
"The clown look is in."
The World's Worst English Teacher?
World's worst fencer.
The one who pronounces "epee" as it appears to sound. (It's eh'pay folks)
World's Worst marksman.
I shot an arrow in the air; it must have landed, I know not where.
Worlds Worst Tailor
Hmm.. you look to be about this size... that looks about this long... and, oh my goodness, I don't even want to guess how big that is! *person tries on clothing*
Why don't it fit! *Because you didnt' measure, dork!*
World's Worst...eh...sad person?
I crashed my 400,000 dollar Ferrari...I'm so sad, boo hoo, now I have to go and buy another one. What a hassle!
World's Worst Marathoner
Ouch! I stubbed my toe coming of the starting block and I don't know if I can make it one block, let alone 26 miles, 385 yards.
Worlds Worst Tuba Player
"Ok...So what in the world is a Tuba?"
World's Worst Watchmaker!
"Time is an irrelevant social construction."
World's Worst Photographer.
Hey! It looks like there's a tree growing out of his head!!!!! Hey, that's funny!!!! LEt's keep it like that!!! *click*
World's worst amish person
"W00t! I pwned j00! LOL!LOL!! I'm l33t!!"
Worlds worst bicycle repair man. (wink, wink, nudge, nudge. Know what I mean? )
(I'm lost Buk...how does that relate to the world's worst amish person?)
As for the bicycle repairman -- "Brakes? Can't you just coast to a stop?"
World's Worst Hobbit!
Hey! I'm 6 feet tall!
World's Worst Fashion Designer.
"Just put the darn barrel on and get the heck out of my store."
World's Worst driving student.
Eruwen: That is leet speak and AOL speak. The lingo of computer geeks and fanatic online gamers. Given the amishes wiev on technology, you would have to be a very bad amish to speak like that. (and a bad person in general, if you do it on a forum...)
Ah ha -- now I get it, Buk! Very true, that would be the world's worst amish person.
World's Worst Driving Student: "Which side of the road should I drive on again?"
World's Worst Novelist.
"and so teh uniersity of tetrrrrrritirdhh came into a genral stte of bing. u may still hve a qstin abt tht, but teh governator knows." (I wish I could say my writing was a little better than that."
worlds worst employee.
(Chewing bubble gum loudly and tapping foot impatiently) "Uh-huh, yeah, sure, whatever, I know how work the cash register... who cares about the stupid customer anyways..."
World's Worst Picture Frame Maker
One size fits all! Give us your picture, we stick the frame on, and we WILL make it fit! If the picture's too big, we just cut off a bit, or a bit more, if needed. If it's too small, never fear; a large frame will make people notice a tiny picture peeping out of one corner. And our frames are wonderfully compatable for any decor, as they are all a striking lime green with purple stripes.
World's worst bookstore.
Well in 1972 it was the International Airport near Madrid, Spain. I couldn't find anything to read there except dry non-fiction, nary a page of mystery, adventure, SciFi, or fantasy.
World's Worst Candy Bar
YUCKK! This candy bar tastes like Quinine!
World's Worst commercials maker!
"What do you mean hand puppets are out?"
World's Worst breath mint
"You take this clove of garlic, chew it, and breeeaaath."
Worlds Worst brand of automobile
At last, the world' first fully electronic car which runs on 1,000 AAA batteries. You will need to replace them after every mile.... we are working on a mains attachment but the lead isn't long enough yet...... Oh and to make it lighter we've taken out the passenger seats.... and the hole in the floor is for your feet when you need to brake.......
World's Worst dictionary definition....
Definition : Check page 96 of the English Oxford Dictionary!
World's Worst beauty queen!
The one who says:"If I were the president of the US, I'd give all the money to poor" - it's so affected and assumed!!!
World's Worst secret agent...
World's Worst Secret Agent...
"Tap shoes are my footwear of choice."
World's Worst Swordsman.
Right, then.... which end is it again? Ah, this one. OW!!!!!!!!!
World's worst calligraphy expert.
I is a gud righter
World's Worst bank robber
"Hurry, pedal as fast as you can!"
World's Worst Ballerina.
"Dance on my toes? You've got to be kidding!"
World's Worst poet.
"The best line to start any poem with is:
Roses are red, violets are blue..."
World's Worst Pilot.
- Oops, I think I've pushed a catapult button...! The crew says goodbye to you and wishes you a good flight!
World's Worst Butler...
"Don't hand me your hat and coat; there's the closet, hang them up yourself! Who do you think you are anyways, the King if Siam?"
Worlds Worst Football Team (World Cup style, Canadian style, American style, or Australian style)
Grondy! You posted at exactly the same moment as me, you quick little...
"What ball? There's a ball in this game? You're kidding!"
World's Worst Plumber.
"Leak? That's not a leak." *Kicks pipe in.* "Now that's a leak!"
World's Worst Winery.
"We have to wait HOW long for the grog?! I want my booze now!"
World's Worst James Bond
"Bond...oh, I forgot, just a minute... Mummy, how do I usually say: Bond...and then goes my name and then once again Bond!?"
World's Worst Nanny?
"Duct tape works wonders in controlling children."
World's Worst Elf!
Ah, even I know that one: The Worlds Worst Elf is Letgolass, er Legolamb, er Legolamp, er Legolass, well its something like that.
What would you rather do or go fishing?
What would you rather do or go fishing?
Hey Grondy what did you think this thread was? Its not "How random can you be?", its "World's Worst..". So no questions here!
World's worst hijacker!
"Please Mr. Pilot, would it be possible for me to I drive the plane. I hope! I hope! I hope!"
Worlds Worst Gameshow Host
(Oops! Sorry about that Lord_aragorn86, I must have had my mind somewhere else when I typed that. Oh well, it wasn't the first time I've done that and probably won't be the last time either.)
"And the winner of our game tonight is...me!"
World's Worst computer technican
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Uhh...yes! What did you say your Problem was? O Right! Now See that box down there? Yeah...the whatsoever-it-is-called? What did yo say? CPU? Oh yeah..that's what its called I guess. Right! Now take a hammer and smash its front. No Trust me. Right done that? Good. Now go buy a new computer for yourselves. Thank you for calling us up and asking for our help.
World's Worst Chess player